Dirt And Roses
by Ser.REnity
Summary: Smoke and mirrors, gunshot wounds that will never heal... and the world lies in ruins. So what does a god dream of?


**Hi there and welcome to an Avengers fanfic. Taking place after the movie, in an AU where Iron Man wasn't fast enough and the nuclear bomb detonated.  
I chose the wonderful song, sung by the lovely Tim McIlrath of Rise Against, for this one and cut parts of the lyrics. Excuse this procedure, but it is only partly suitable for a movie like Avengers, if you ask me. (It's on the Soundtrack, though, as you probably all know :D)**

**Thank you for reading this- enjoy your stay. :)**

* * *

**Dirt And Roses**

_This city grieves, like widows clasping _

I watched the alien planes leave that day. Their engines stained the sky with their presence; although there was nothing left to worsen. And quite frankly, they left as quietly as they had come years ago.

Manhattan hadn't ever looked like this. I remembered a time when I had lived in an apartment above the clouds you never saw anymore nowadays. Happy times, safer times. Back then, the world looked different- that was as much as I could bring myself to remember.

Had the sun always been that bright?

_Raindrops spill like dirt and roses  
On black coffins in the dark _

The streets were empty and I found myself wishing they were filled once more. Filled with even more empty people and children crying their annoying fears out into the world. They would never scream anymore.

_Unless we save our lives,  
From the coming tide,  
That seeks to drown us in it's waves _

I saw mirrors on the way through the city. So who looked back? Was it me? I could not remember what my hair had looked like before the sun burned it all. Haunted eyes in a haunted face and yet my serenity had no equal this day. It ad been too long to worry.

I saw smoke descend into the bright red sky. Were people warming by the fireside or burning one another to preserve food? I laughed at my reflection and continued walking.

Had it always been like that? So quiet?

_Then we'll rue each passing day_

Against all odds, I saw a figure standing on a plaza not far from me. I wondered if he would kill me if I greeted him- I would have tossed a coin if I had had one. Dropped one for humanity.

"So now they are gone for good", I heard myself say as I approached the man who had turned his gaze upwards, following the spaceships with his eyes. I wondered if he craved to follow them.

I recognized him the second he turned to face me.

_And I swore this place was once alive  
The streets all pulsed like living veins  
Heart worth beating, coarse with blood_

"I am the last."

I nodded. How could I not know.

And as I stayed silent, he smiled and looked down on the ground that showed signs of decay as we all did. We were part of the city we had watched as it went burst into flames.

_The buildings breathe each time they sway_

"You do not look like one of them", I said.

"I never was. It changes nothing."

"It does prevent them from taking you with them."

A hundred years ago, a millennium from now, he had been responsible for what happened. Now he was one of them and a god no longer.

_The time of death  
The sky turned red  
Then came the rain _

"Loki", I said.

He looked at me with tired eyes and smirked.

"You remember me."

_From the coming tide,  
That seeks to drown us in it's waves. _

It was a silent walk. The city was in ruins and so were we; drained of words and the ability to care about our misery.

Since the incident long ago, it had never been night or day, just the merciful in-between, praised by both sun and moon. If they existed somewhere in the blood-red sky.

"How long has it been?", he asked.  
"A decade, maybe."

"A lifetime."

"A week?"

"It all happened yesterday", he said.

_They drown, they'll crush you from the top  
I'd rather die, I would rather chase them down  
These worlds are crashing forward, they try to set alight  
Build our true fates while they drown_

The rivers had run dry and so had the people. Corpses graced the way we walked, greeting us with their unwavering, never-caring smiles. Their teeth glistened in the not-sun and I wanted to feel good.

"Why are you alive?", he asked.

"I am not."

"Why did you survive?"

I laughed and took his hand as I began to run.

Behind us, the street collapsed in its wake of disarray, leaving a mouth to swallow us whole- and yet it did nothing of the sort.

We should have gone to hell a long time ago; we had missed the opportunity.

But the city was consumed as it broke loose and I could not bring myself to even miss what it took.

_Like fallen soldiers on these fields,  
We spared our lives  
Bodies hurled up on the wheels_

"Like that", I laughed, "I ran."

I kissed him with passion, with anger and lust. Or maybe I dreamed of kissing him so that his world ended like mine had. He would have never survived achieving what his brother had not- and I could have laughed at him and watch him end.

_I swear we tried  
I gave up on on this godforsaken sight,  
And felt it all pass by. _

"Ironic, isn't it?", I asked and chuckled, "That the bomb sent to protect us killed everyone. Every last of the people here."

He stayed silent for only a second.

"Has he ever spoken of me before he died?

"Sometimes."

I saw him hurt and it never got to me. I was no person to insult him and pretend he deserved pain, but my heart had lost its function that day. What was it good for if there was no one left in the world? You did not need a heart to survive.

"It pained him to mention your name."

"He thought me useless. Weak. A failure."

I laughed.

"Never. It pained him to have wronged you unintentionally. To be unable to help you."

_Come on, let's save our lives,  
From the coming tide, _

A god did not cry, but he did not have to. He mourned the loss his own way.

_That seeks to drown us in its waves_

"Has he ever spoken of me before he died?", I asked.

He smiled bitterly.

"Always."

I wondered if he felt what I couldn't. Sadness- or more.

"He loved you."

"I know", I said.

He looked at me with an inquisitive glare.

"I wonder why."

"How would I know?"

_Then we'll rue each passing day_

The moment the TV screens flickered and radio signals died had marked the end of the city and the heroes trapped within its clutches. So many people had died this day and yet I knew I would never remember their names.

"Why did you survive?", I asked him, "And why didn't they?"

"I don't know."

"Tell me of their deaths."

He seemed reluctant to follow my command.

"The man of iron was obliterated first. He was closest to the missile and died trying to save his people. The humans, even the man out of time, had stayed too close to the portal and their feeble shells could not resist the fire. As for the green beast... his body could have lived to see another day. It altered in the waves and consumed itself- what created him once killed him now.

As for him... he protected me. Shielded me from the fire and burned. As a hero, of course, a martyr. I hate him for it."

In time, I was told, even broken bones would mend. But who could believe a beautiful lie like that? It never ceased to amaze me.

A moment from now we could be gone and lost forever.

_Our lives, _

"I will rue each passing day", he said.

I shook my head.

"How could you? You never had the power to destroy as much as you did."

_It's coming clear, _

"Would you believe in me if you could? Even after I failed you the thousandth time in a row? After I tried to kill you? After betrayal became a habit?", he asked.

My sneer hurt him. His eyes betrayed the vulnerability knowledge had planted within him.

"I can't. So what is the point in asking?"

_Yeah it's becoming clear_

I watched the empty sky. Now they were gone, those invaders of a dead planet. They had sucked the life right from its veins and left it empty and barren. All mankind had ever been in their eyes was a distraction from a real war, a fair fight. Our struggle had never posed a threat.

"What will you do now?", he asked.

"What is left to do?"

I knew I was right to ask; surviving did not suffice. Living consisted of so much more than being alive and breathing.

"I will find someone and change the world", I continued.

He smiled.

"That is not the worst of plans. Maybe you will succeed where I could not."

"Do you wish for another chance?"

"Would you give it to me?"

I studied his face, searching for ingenuity.

"Maybe."

For a moment, I saw hope flicker in his eyes like a dying light bulb. It cooled down quickly and died soon enough.

"I am not the someone you search for."

_To me... _

We parted ways a few hours later, becoming strangers once more.

I watched how the god took one final look at the sky and turned around.

I felt comfortable knowing I would never see him again.

The streets would consume us all the same.

_And we'll live each passing day..._


End file.
